Be a Man!?

I've been involved with a wonderful group of people since 2011 working on a project called Grow Boys. We know now that in the beginning our paths converged as a result of what we were observing in our work and our community, and because we were all asking similar questions. We saw boys struggling in so many ways, and we were wondering why. All of us represent agencies with particular exposure to the struggles of boys... among us are teachers, service groups, business owners, health care providers, school administrators, social workers, counselors, youth workers and others who work closely with boys every day. A friend recently pointed me to this video trailer from the Representation Project... (language warning)

The film hasn't been released yet, but as soon as it is I plan to screen it at my school for parents, staff and students and I intend also to use the educational material offered as well. There is another film called MISREPRESENTATION that I also intend to purchase and use to work with the same groups. This material is really good stuff. THE MASK YOU LIVE IN frames the reason why our diverse group of engaged adults got together back in 2011, and we believe strongly that we need to continue our work but (surprisingly to us since the beginning) we have not been immune from detractors. This is what I want to talk a bit about.
 

To state the obvious, there is controversy that runs along gender identity lines. No matter what side of this controversy you fall, it would be difficult to justify that it manifests in any good way for any particular individual, male or female, who is struggling through a personal search for identity. How we choose to represent ourselves to the world is a deeply personal decision, one that should be honored and respected. But often it isn't. Expectations, perceived or real, of what we think we should represent will either allow or prevent us from being true to ourselves. No matter what we decide to represent, judgment seems to rear its ugly head and we are then forced to consider our choice with acceptance or not. But what if we didn't have to do that? What if the world respected each of our decisions to be what we felt natural being; to be what we wanted to be and represent what we wanted to represent without having judgment passed upon us? 

Camp Everywhere...

I never experienced summer camp. The closest I got to a summer camp experience was what we called Cub Camp, a two day overnight camp when I was a Cub Scout many years ago. I got homesick and didn't think I was going to make it to the end, but I did. I also experienced some good, and some bad family holidays during the summers of my youth, but going to a real week long or longer summer camp never happened for me. I have heard lots of entertaining stories about summer camp experiences from friends who did go though. I'm going to focus on the good ones.

 Via http://summercampconfessions.tumblr.com/post/24196360964

My colleague Everett (@mrtetz) and I were talking last week. We were going back and forth about what we'd do with a million dollars. He has this idea to build a summer camp for kids from at risk environments. Beyond the essentials of providing a safe, non judgmental and supportive environment at this camp, he would like to offer ways for kids to connect; with activities that help build their esteem, and with people who support them. What a great idea, but how to do this connection thing? How would we get kids to learn about themselves, face their fears, try new things, push their boundaries and accept themselves on the way to making these important connections? No small order.

"We're raising boys..."

This is cross-posted from Grow Boys Red Deer at http://www.reddeergrowboys.ca/. I have been involved with the Grow Boys project for three years now, and it has been one of the most rewarding initiatives I have taken on. For more information on the Grow Boys concept, please get in touch and we can talk.

  by  Ryan Qiu 

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard.

Mother would come out and say,

"You're tearing up the grass!"

"We're not raising grass," Dad would reply.

"We're raising boys." -author unknown

We are raising boys. All of us. No matter who we are in the community, whether we are a parent or not; we all have a responsibility to support the happy, healthy growth and development of boys. Of course we need to do this for girls as well, but Grow Boys is a collective that focuses specifically on what can be done to nurture the particular needs of boys; and there are many. As the dad in the poem suggests, we need to take a critical and reflective perspective toward what our boys need from us, and how we're going to provide for them.

  by  Dave_B_ 

Herbert Vilakazi's opening address to the National Association of Child Care Workers 1991 Biennial Conference (http://tinyurl.com/yfxzdwn) in South Africa provides one such perspective with his brilliant insight to how we need to think and act if we are to support today's children as our gifts to the future.

"The problems of children and of youth, giving rise to child and youth care programs, can only begin to be solved in that society of humankind’s dream; a more collective-oriented society than at present, when the father of the child shall be every man as old as the child’s father; when the mother of the child shall be every woman as old as the child’s mother; a society of responsibility of the entire community; a society without poverty; without the inequalities of society members, based upon race, class, or sex; a society without the use of violence against other members of society; a society without any exploitation and oppression of any group by any other group; a society of equals; a thoroughly democratic society; last, but not least a society that shall have, once more, incorporated productive labor into the educational process."