tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post8932766032348045444..comments2023-11-11T22:23:28.499-07:00Comments on KARE Givers: EduKare- Resilient Communities...Seanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17898902767993372053noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-58139894128401534592011-06-22T23:06:34.663-06:002011-06-22T23:06:34.663-06:00The web holds much possibility... I agree, but at ...The web holds much possibility... I agree, but at some point it has to be a vessel that connects people in ways that empower them to be "in the present" with other people; one that connects them in ways that allow them to feel hope through the connection. I think the narrative of those that become "connected" is the key to sharing their hope.Seanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17898902767993372053noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-35754480035372822011-06-06T07:32:24.828-06:002011-06-06T07:32:24.828-06:00Daniel,
Reaching out online is the easy part, esp...Daniel,<br /><br />Reaching out online is the easy part, especially with a pseudonym. It's in person that feels terrifying. Online I can tell my story. But in real life I am afraid that my neighbors know what a fraud I am.Miss Shuganahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13200157646397610173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-61115879860664021302011-06-06T06:00:04.931-06:002011-06-06T06:00:04.931-06:00Great post Sean! I was mulling yesterday and a di...Great post Sean! I was mulling yesterday and a distinction between stories and narratives came to mind. I suspect that nemiSpheres are the narrative contexts in which our own stories are embedded, like nemiTubes. When our stories come together, they nTangle. When a nemiSphere is filled with harsh ecpwaves the nemiTube nTanglement happens less because there is no Trust. When there is no trust our stories become fixed in circumstances outside of our control, we become victimized and isolated. <br /><br />Resilience seems to be an awareness of the causes, components, and conditions that keep perpetuating destructive ecpwaves in the nemispheres. That means we recognize and accept responsibility for the narratives that hold us back from manifesting the stories that are in our highest and best nemiSpheres. <br /><br />That is to say, when we change our stories in the context of a broader narrative, we can become heroes of our lives. We can enter a larger nemisphere that is more resilient and connects us with the heroes of our lives. I suspect it is the hope in a more holistic and less fearful nemisphere that keeps mothers like Miss Shuganah reaching out to others online. <br /><br />The web is an nemisphere of great hope for the world, but we don't yet know how to collectively apply its potential to our communities in a face-to-face context. Thankfully Educare is applying nemetics in a manner which I think is leading us toward a "how".Daniel Durranthttp://danieldurrant.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-9462005246865113152011-06-05T15:58:10.035-06:002011-06-05T15:58:10.035-06:00I'd be curious to know when the shift occurred...I'd be curious to know when the shift occurred... the swing of the pendulum to caring for kids to the detriment of parents. <br /><br />We need a happy medium. Protect children first and foremost. I discovered that parents are suspected first when anything happens. I also learned, much to my distress, that mothers are investigated before fathers are. <br /><br />Nurture the mothers. Give us a village. Many of us are dying spiritual deaths, cell by cell, as we accumulate guilt in this consumerist society. <br />When hippies turned in their love beads for briefcases, we started to die a slow spiritual death. <br /><br />As we shift from public schools to charter, we simultaneously shift from inclusion to exclusion. You and I are on the same page. I hope others will join in and comment on your thoughtful post.Miss Shuganahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13200157646397610173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-64093018932437227312011-06-05T15:08:14.622-06:002011-06-05T15:08:14.622-06:00We have indeed.
I use the church (in whatever den...We have indeed. <br />I use the church (in whatever denomination) as one example of that "sense of belonging to something bigger than ourselves"... a circle of support so to speak, but you are correct; there are many. However, all have to start with the will to provide, care and be involved without judgement, and with an eye toward solutions, not condemnations.Seanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17898902767993372053noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-70266571863000670932011-06-05T15:01:42.720-06:002011-06-05T15:01:42.720-06:00Not sure if church is the answer, but certainly so...Not sure if church is the answer, but certainly something more compassionate than an overwhelmed bureaucracy. I almost felt sorry for the investigator sent to investigate me. She clearly is in over her head. <br /><br />We need more services that work and that are community driven. If I am looking for a village and I have more emotional wherewithal than most, then I worry about what parents with less emotional reserves do when faced with adversity. <br /><br />The investigator looked at my house and immediately diagnosed me with depression and in need of meds. How she could determine that within five minutes is beyond me. I took it in stride. I also could imagine me, five, ten years earlier perhaps taking that offhanded remark more to heart. I do sometimes tweet, not dead yet. That kind of remark is not only unprofessional, it is out and out harmful. A weaker woman might rush upstairs and OD or take things out on her kids. When I read news stories, I do sometimes think that could have been me. <br /><br />Very few people have to endure this kind of ordeal, but it is humiliating, and, furthermore, it is difficult to move past. <br /><br /><a href="http://fumblingaboutinthedark.blogspot.com/2010/11/one-mother-desperately-in-search-of.html" rel="nofollow">One Mother Desperately in Search of a Village</a> <br /><br />The isolation many feel is stifling. I don't seek out neighbors because my house, albeit in better shape than a year ago, is still far from being House and Garden. I am frightened. I feel traumatized. When there's a knock at the door now, I jump. To whom can I safely reach out? Can I trust my kids' teachers? <br /><br />Last night two teachers talked about surveying their parents. I cautioned them that parents may be wary. It is sad that it's come to this. Those of us who need help are afraid to seek it. And so we struggle.<br /><br />Whether it's school or church, we need to know there is a place where we are safe and where we know our kids will be safe. <br /><br />We have lost ourselves. Poets like TS Eliot and WH Auden warned us about this as our society shifted to post-modern ways of life. Reclaiming community is a tall order. You are here. I am here. It's a start.Miss Shuganahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13200157646397610173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-53929209467767714442011-06-05T14:34:54.530-06:002011-06-05T14:34:54.530-06:00Thanks for your comment Debbie... you have touched...Thanks for your comment Debbie... you have touched on something I have been thinking about for a long time. In fact, I was talking about this just last week at my school.<br /><br />In the context, for example, of church providing different forms of care and support for social need in society, with separation of church and state, "social services" has become bureaucratized, and we have come to know government as the only institution that can save our social state. I'm not saying that gov't. social services is inherently bad, but simply that we default to them and have lost our connection with the best forms of social services to ever exist; ourselves.<br />NamasteSeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17898902767993372053noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5574469779496191524.post-28213863353511456612011-06-05T14:08:56.536-06:002011-06-05T14:08:56.536-06:00I am going to go back and reread this and probably...I am going to go back and reread this and probably several times. My initial thought/reaction is one of gratitude. <br /><br />I survived two DCFS investigations last year, and since then I have seen evidence of DCFS (and related agencies) used as a cudgels against parents. But what has surprised me is having conversations with teachers who have had parents threaten them and administrators with this and parents threatening other parents. <br /><br />In other words, an agency that was set up to protect children is being used more and more as a threat or leverage against other adults. My impression is that this has become pathological, ie, very different than how these agencies were intended to function.<br /><br />Back when I was a kid growing up on Chicago's Southeast Side, we had block mothers. I knew that when I saw an orange decal with a black house outline on it, that was a safe place for me to go. My mother never worried as I wondered about the block because she knew that other moms were on the look out. <br /><br />She also knew that when I'd climb the fence to visit our retired neighbor, that he really was teaching me about gardening and not doing anything untoward.<br /><br />These days we don't know our neighbors and when our impulsive younger daughter ran down to the corner to probably watch the fire truck back into the firehouse, the firemen told me that she was too young to be down the street by herself. When I protested that she was eight, they told me she was too young. I felt mortified, too, when the police showed up at our doorstep to do a wellness check on her. At that time she still didn't know our address, and so it is probably a good thing they did check. <br /><br />It's a sad commentary when I feel more at ease talking to people online than I do with people who live on my block. We live anonymous lives. No one wants to get involved.<br /><br />Our older daughter is severely disabled. I can count on one hand how many times in the past fifteen years anyone in real life has asked me how I am doing. <br /><br />We need to find a way to be gentler with one another and to return to presumed innocent. Too many of us, as casual observers, judge instead of fact find. Community requires taking time instead of making snap judgments. We need to do better.Miss Shuganahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13200157646397610173noreply@blogger.com